


Blood of the Covenant

by Biweatherman



Category: Groundhog Day - Minchin/Rubin
Genre: Gen, Light Angst, Mary Connors, The Connors family, Wakes & Funerals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-20
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2019-01-01 00:48:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12144906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Biweatherman/pseuds/Biweatherman
Summary: Phil comes to terms with his relationship with his mother and reaffirms who his family is.





	Blood of the Covenant

The phone felt heavy in Phils hand as he just stared at it, his thumb hovering over the contact number. He didn’t know why this was so hard, apologising to Mary had been difficult, sure, but at least he’d been able to dial the number and not hang up before the person on the other end picked up. Of course, he had been talking to his sister even before the loop, but that had been tense messages on birthdays and holidays, not a real conversation. Apologising to her for his jerkish behaviour had been awkward, and hard to convince her he was genuine, but at least he’d been able to actually do it and now had a semi-normal relationship with her. 

He just had to call the number, not hang up and speak to his mother who he hadn’t seen for fifteen years. Oh, and then he had to apologize for his behaviour, which had been terrible, and not expect her to apologize for the way she’d treated him or expect her to acknowledge that she might have a small part to play in just how many walls he’d put up between himself and the rest of the world. Because that was the way their relationship worked, if he took the blame it’d all work out. 

This was a stupid idea. She might be his mother but that didn’t make her his family, he’d come to terms with that fact long ago. He had taken longer, much longer to realise it wasn’t all his fault and to understand he didn’t have to block everyone out just because someone who should’ve cared didn’t. He was about to put the phone away when it burst into life. It was his sister, the one person who actually fit into both his biological and chosen family. 

“Mary! How are you? How’s Carmen?”

Phils enthusiastic greeting was met with silence, completely unlike Mary who always had something to say. He would’ve dismissed it as a handbag call but there was no background noise, just the sound of Mary's deep, shaky breaths. Something was wrong. 

“Mary. What’s wrong? Is it something to do with Carmen?” Phil said, knowing that something happening to Mary's fiance would be the worst case scenario for her. 

“N-no, Carmen’s fine. It’s uh, it’s Mom. She was walking back from the grocery store and I guess she was looking or something because she was in a hit and run, she didn’t make it to the hospital.”

“I’m so sorry, Mary. Do you need me to drive over, I can ask for time off work, they’ll understand.” Phil said numbly, saying what needed to be said, not really sure how he felt. There was grief and pain and sadness but it seemed set away from him, like there was a layer between his consciousness and his emotions. Yes, she was his mother but they hadn’t talked in ages and even when they had they’d never had a particularly harmonious relationship. He was sad that Mary was in pain, but how he actually felt about his mother's death was hard to pin down. 

“Thank you for the offer, but I know how much you love your job, and anyway having you here would add to the chaos. But I will be sending an invitation for the funeral”

The invitation arrived in the mail two days after the phone call. Phil wasn’t sure he wanted to go.  
He didn’t see the point. He was sad she was dead, it was hard to live with someone for over eighteen years and not be sad about their passing. But the distance they had always had between them, even when they had talked, meant it felt like losing someone who was already dead. He’d had his own funeral for his mother when their relationship truly fell apart, another one felt obsolete. 

Rita had urged him to go to the funeral. He had never told her the specifics about his relationship with his mother but Rita was smart, she knew his family was complicated.  
“Phil, go, it will give you closure” Rita argued as she poured herself some coffee at the Station as they took a ten between filming. 

“I don’t need closure, my relationship with my mother ended over a decade ago, when she threatened to disown me when I was slightly rude to her at an extremely tense christmas, and I said I’d have no problem with that. A mutual ending of the relationship. No need for closure.” 

Rita just nodded, obviously unwilling to press the issue, surprised he’d opened up this much about his family; even after the loop there were some walls he kept up. Instead she tried a different tactic. “Go for Mary. She just lost her mother, don’t be an ass and make her think she lost her brother as well”

It was hard to argue with Rita, especially when Mary was brought into it. They might not have stayed close, but as kids they’d been inseparable, always there for each other. It seemed wrong to not be there for Mary now. Which was why he found himself driving the two and half hour journey to Cleveland on a dreary Friday afternoon. 

“Phil, it’s great to see you.” Mary said with a smile but Phil could see just how tired she was and he enveloped her in a hug hoping to ease the pain and help her however he could. 

“Phil, I’ve heard much about you. It’s great to finally meet you, I just wish it was under better circumstances” Carmen said, standing at Mary's side. 

“Me too. I promise to be visiting more, hopefully the next time we meet it will be under happier circumstances, your wedding for one,” That was the right thing to say it seemed as they both started to talk happily about colour schemes, cake flavours and flower arrangements, pulling out their phones to show him different options and ask for his opinion. Any tension or awkwardness there had been faded and Mary was distracted from the funeral preparation, focused instead on preparations for a much more joyous occasion. 

Phil stayed at Mary’s side throughout the funeral, there as a support and not for his own grief, no matter how guilty that made him. He knew that even if he made a different decision and called, or called earlier, nothing would have changed. He still tortured himself with what-ifs late at night: situations where he had called sooner and apologised and she had accepted the apology and, depending on how much he wanted to hurt himself, sometimes gave one of her own. In these situations she had changed just as much as he had and they had a proper, open and loving relationship. Of course every morning, when he wasn’t left lying in bed alone with his thoughts in the dark, he thought through it logically and knew they wouldn’t have had a normal relationship. He also knew that he would never feel grief at this funeral, because how could he feel truly sad about a family member being buried when the person in question wasn’t family, not really? Instead his family was beside him, was in Pittsburgh, was in Punxsutawney but his family wasn’t in the coffin being lowered into the ground and Phil was okay with that.


End file.
